Menopause is not a one woman job. Without the right people around you on the meno pathway the route is hard and solitary. I quite like being on my own at times just so I can detach my brain from having to worry about anything other than myself. I guess it’s my peculiar version of self care. But then there are times when you need to have your peeps who get you, at the end of the line or video, or even better in person. 

I know at times I thought I must be the only woman on the planet feeling so crap, even when I’d worked out what IT was, you still get these moments of ‘why me!’. Then once you have your pity party over and done with, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and tune in to the positives. During the gentle ebb & flow and erratic ups and downs on the pathway, there are lightning bolts of clarity and warm hugs of enlightenment. Sounds incredibly woo woo but I can’t think how else to explain it. Even though it’s bloody tough at times, already my mind has moved on to the new zone, so I’m making sure I write as much of the awful stuff down now before my mind and body conveniently forgets. At least I assume it will, a bit like childbirth. I did it once and it was until I was moments away from doing it the second time I suddenly remembered I didn’t like it, but it was too late by then.

You may think you are on your own and that no one will understand what you are going through. Maybe you’ve tried to explain in the past but it fell on deaf ears, but trust me you are not alone. Take a look on social media and you will find group upon group there to support you. Some can be a bit too maudlin so spend your time wisely. Twitter and Instagram on the other hand are full of amazing women who have many more skills than me and will guide you in the different disciplines, such as physio, yoga, counselling and nutrition. Plus there are some simply darn fabulous women who are armed and ready to empower you.

Please don’t think that no one is talking about IT. You just need to know where to look and when you’ve found the peeps that you connect with, don’t forget to spread the word. We really do not want to be the best kept secret.

“Once you have your pity party over and done with, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and tune in to the positives.”

Your other meno team members need to come for your close friends and family. This may be a bit tricky if you’re not really sure of the facts yourself, so start off by grabbing a FREE copy of my ebook at the bottom of this article. You read it first then pass it on to them. Once you’ve all got the basics covered, book a meno chat with them. In the book you’ll read about how I got my daughters involved in supporting me rather than rolling their eyes at every whinge and moan I had. It’s only recently I’ve come to realise how much I must have gone on about my tiredness. I no longer experience the crushing fatigue which would bring me to a standstill, but the girls will still say to this day, ‘are you sure you’re not too tired to do that mum’. This time it’s me that rolls my eyes …’No I am not too tired’.

Keep the conversation going. You need to make it clear that hormones are the explanation, not the excuse. You are going to play your part in the menopause management process and gradually build your own meno tool kit, but if your nearest and dearest can also get onboard the highs will far outweigh the lows. Remember this is for life, not just for Christmas.

Part 6 coming soon